A Burning Desire To Educate – Redneck Headlines
Here are today’s Redneck Headlines:
#1 – THE ACCUSED FLIPS THE BIRD
#2 – A BURNING DESIRE TO EDUCATE
#3 – TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA STONERS
Michael Crane will never be called a stool pigeon. The Arizona man, who’s on trial for murder, refused to say a word when called to testify in the case, choosing instead to take the stand and squawk like a bird.
Crane was attending a hearing to determine his mental capacity when he was called to the stand the first time. At that point, he demanded that his name be written in all capital letters, and insisted that he be referred to as a corporation.
When he returned from a recess called to ponder these demands, Crane clammed up entirely and, when pressed, began his seagull-like squawking. He was forcibly removed from the courtroom, but told to return next month.
Source: Huffington Post
Most kids have to wait to get to school to take part in a fire drill, but not one Florida teenager, whose mom encouraged her to skedaddle to her school bus by setting her bedroom on fire.
Adrienne Ashley shoved a sheaf of burning paper under the girl’s door after she refused to come out and said she wasn’t planning to go to school that day. The mother of the year candidate ended up setting fire to a chair that the girl had pushed against the door to keep her out.
Speaking in her own defense, Ashley called her daughter “stupid” and refused to apologize for the incident.
Source: Orlando Sentinel
Holy Donatello! A California man making a delivery for a medical marijuana service went to cops to report that he was unable to complete his order — because he’d been robbed by ninjas!
The courier, a man in his 40s, says he was startled by a group of men dressed in black and wielding batons, so he dropped his cash and a bag of high quality “medicine.”
Police were not aware of any other recent crimes involving suspects dressed as ninjas.
Source: San Gabriel Valley Tribune