Don't spend hours scouring the web for the best and weirdest news from around the world - let us do it! Each weekday we proudly present you with the best Redneck Headlines and the stories behind them.

Here are today's Redneck Headlines:
#1 - Bottle Baby
#2 - Deja Vu... Make It A Double
#3 - Doggone Crazy!

Bottle Baby

A Florida man left a little something extra for a clerk at a combination bar-liquor store over the weekend – his 11-month-old baby!

Kenneth Rowe, who was drinking inside the establishment, walked over to the employee and said he needed to go outside for a smoke, and asked the woman to act as a temporary babysitter. By the time he got back, he was drunk, but demanded that the clerk return the baby ... and promptly took the child to the middle of the street, where he laid down, cradling the baby.

Rowe tried to elude cops by hiding in some bushes, but the crying kid gave him away. He was arrested on child endangerment charges. (WPIX)

 

Deja Vu... Make It a Double 

An Oklahoma woman begged cops not to take her down the the police station after pulling her over for DUI, since if they did, she'd miss a very important appointment ... at a court where she had to answer another DUI charge.

Thomasine Harjo was busted after driving through a police barrier that was set up to block traffic from the scene of a fatal accident. When an officer approached, he noticed a strong smell of alcohol coming from Harjo, whose speech was slurred. She told the deputy she couldn't go to jail because she was expected in court, and when he asked why, she replied, "DUI."

The excuse didn't fly, and Harjo was booked on charges of driving under the influence and obstruction of justice. (Huffington Post)

 

Doggone Crazy!

A Florida homeowner proved his bite was worse than his bark – by shooting an intruder who was trying to choke the life out of his guard dog ... while stark naked.

The fur really flew when the armed man was awakened by a loud commotion on the first floor of his house shortly after 5 a.m. and went down to check on the ruckus – only to be be confronted by the naked burglar. The intruder briefly took his attention away from the pooch and tried to bite the homeowner, who then opened fire, hitting him in the leg.

The suspect, who refused to give his identity, is charged with burglary, animal cruelty, resisting arrest with violence and lewd and lascivious behavior. (MSNBC)

 

 

 

 

wanna-be burglar in Georgia is in a ho-ho-hole lotta trouble after getting stuck when he went up the chimney without care during a heist.