Drink And Bear It – Redneck Headlines
Here are today’s Redneck Headlines:
#1 – DRINK AND BEAR IT
#2 – NOW THAT’S A MAGIC JOHNSON
#3 – YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN IDIOTIC
There’s nothing all that unusual about a visitor to Los Angeles walking around wasted after ingesting an unknown substance… unless that visitor is a 500-pound bear!
The bear had wandered a bit too close to homes in a suburb of L.A. from its normal home in the mountains north of the city, so animal control officers got into the act and hit the critter with several tranquilizer darts. The meds didn’t knock the bear out, though witnesses say he was wandering the streets looking “like he had one heck of a hangover.”
Fans even set up a Twitter account for the bear, which was nicknamed “Glen Bearian,” and posted the note, “We got to stop at In N Out Burger on the way to the woods!”
A Philadelphia-area drug dealer saw his claim of innocence spring a leak after he wet his pants at a police station leading cops to notice that he had more than 80 bags of dope tied around the end of his Johnson.
Ray Woods was initially pulled over for a traffic violation, but when officers approached him to ask questions, they noticed an extremely large bulge in his pants. Rather than assume he was just glad to see them, they chose to bring him to the police station, where Woods ended up giving himself the shaft.
A police spokesman said, “In 14 years, I’ve seen it down their pants, in their butts, but I’ve never seen it tied to their unit. I guess they figure the police officers aren’t going to check down in that area.”
Source: Philadelphia Inquirer
An Indiana man is being forced to cop to a very stupid choice after rigging his cell phone with flashing lights in order to impersonate a cop then pulling over a real officer with his new toy.
Chad Voegelo pulled up next to the car laughing until he saw the person he attempted to stop flash a Fort Wayne police badge. He sped off, and went to the most logical place, a bar where he bought a drink and was arrested moments later.