Rodeo Rick scours the web each weekday for the best and weirdest news headlines from around the world. We proudly present you our Redneck Headlines and the stories behind them.

Here are today's Redneck Headlines:

#1 - FLOWERS COULD GET HIM PLANTED IN JAIL
#2 - CLOSETED CROOK
#3 - HE SAID A MOUTHFUL


FLOWERS COULD GET HIM PLANTED IN JAIL

Guys normally get brownie points for sending flowers to their wives on Valentine's Day, but one Wisconsin man got something much different for his trouble, a one-way trip to the pokey.

Zachary Zelko sent a bouquet and a note to his estranged sweetie earlier this week, letting his inner romantic make the choice even though he had a restraining order out against him. He didn't sign the card that came along with the blooms, and a florist's employee specifically remembered him saying he couldn't give his name, as he wasn't allowed to have any contact with the ex.

Zelko is charged with one count of felony bail jumping. If convicted, he could be imprisoned for three years.

SourceSheboygan Press


DETENTION FOR THE OLD GUY

A student who was looking to get a little extra credit with what he thought was a clever essay ended up tossed out of college for more than a year after his instructor objected to its title "Hot For Teacher."

Joseph Corlett, a 56-year-old part-time student, borrowed the title and theme of his essay about his fondness for his instructor from the classic Van Halen song. He says that the suspension took him by surprise, since he racked up a B-plus average writing essays with titles such as "The Boobs I Was Not Supposed to See."

Corlett, who is allowed to take online classes during his suspension, says he's fighting the decision, noting, "Guys have died on the battlefield so I can write naughty things in my English paper."

SourceOakland Press


YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN INVISIBLE

A bunch of San Diego cops spent much of Tuesday afternoon engaged in a tense standoff surrounding a car at the side of a freeway, not realizing that the vehicle was completely empty.

The showdown began after officers spotted the car on Interstate 8 and called for reinforcements, who arrived and began negotiating via loudspeaker. After receiving no response for two hours, they consulted with headquarters and decided to take the next logical step sending in a K-9 unit to fetch what they assumed was a suspect in a home invasion robbery.

The pooch returned empty-handed and the search for the suspect goes on.

SourceHuffington Post