Not The Purr-Fect Crime – Redneck Headlines

Two British burglars were left with egg on their faces when they caused a five-hour police standoff -- after breaking into a cafe to steal some quiche!

The men, who were not identified, smashed a window at a restaurant in northern England and climbed in to grab a quick breakfast -- but that plan got scrambled when cops responded to an alarm. The men apparently panicked and armed themselves with knives from the cafe's kitchen, and insisted they would not surrender peacefully.

The cafe owner says, “When I got there, there was about 15 police cars outside, they were all over the place. There were negotiators and all sorts. They had the riot gear on and Tasers. It was like something you see on the telly."  Source: Daily Mirror

A Florida man had no beef with his local Save-a-Lot supermarket, but he wanted to go to jail, so he loaded up a shopping cart with meat and walked out the front door.

Cops responding to a 911 call about the incident spotted Anthony Moore calmly sitting by the side of the road with the meat-laden cart parked next to him. When an officer asked what was going on, Moore replied that he'd called to turn himself in, and simply wanted to be taken to prison.

The "steaks" turned out to be just enough for Moore, who was locked up because he was unable to post the $1000 bail for the retail theft charges.  Source: Gainesville Sun

An Idaho man was hauled off by cops after he got a little frisky -- with his pet cat.

Ryan Tannenholz, a self-described "furry" who gets to feline groovy when in the presence of other species, was charged with six counts of crimes against nature for repeatedly letting the cat get his tongue -- among other body parts. Though a police spokesperson could not divulge how the department became aware of the crimes, she said the case is "definitely unusual."

Tannenholz, who often dresses up as a Siberian husky during his outings, faces up to five years in prison for each of the felony counts that litter his rap sheet.

Source: Idaho Statesman