Rodeo Rick scours the web each weekday for the best and weirdest news headlines from around the world. We proudly present you our Redneck Headlines and the stories behind them.

Here are today's Redneck Headlines:

#1 - TURNING IN THE MAN IN THE MIRROR
#2 - THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S TRAMP STAMP!
#3 - CALLING A STAPH MEETING


TURNING IN THE MAN IN THE MIRROR

A Cincinnati man was arrested on bank robbery charges after being fingered by an unimpeachable witness - himself!

Frank Coleman slipped a note to a teller demanding she empty her cash drawer into a bag -- and when she told him she didn't have any bags, he produced his own, netting about two grand from the till. But while he managed to get away without triggering any alarms, Coleman triggered something inside himself -- and called 911 less than an hour later to turn himself in.

 

THOU SHALT NOT COVET THY NEIGHBOR'S TRAMP STAMP

The Bible isn't the only place you'll find ink at one Michigan church -- where the pastor has opened a tattoo parlor to draw some new blood to the congregation.

Reverend Steve Bentley of The Bridge Church says he opened Serenity Tattoo as part of his effort to reach out to folks who aren't drawn to traditional places of worship. While some of his parishioners have objected to the practice, Bentley says he views tattooing as "a morally neutral practice" and notes, "You can do it while still sticking to your moral code."

 

CALLING A STAPH MEETING

A Pennsylvania man is probably feeling a little bit under the weather after being arrested on charges of attempted assault with a deadly disease.

Fred Parker walked into an internet cafe and gambling parlor and began rubbing himself against the walls and gaming machines. When asked what the heck he was up to, he informed them that he had a drug-resistant staph infection and demanded money or else he'd start infecting employees.

The cashier refused, and Parker left, but was arrested later that day prompting a police spokesperson to say, "It's our first case of robbery by threat of an infectious disease."

Source: Sharon Herald