iPhone 5 Release Brings Out All the Intellects
In case you’ve been living on a line to buy an iPhone 5, the new…wait, that wouldn’t make sense. The iPhone 5 is out. It’s sure to make the lives of everyone who purchase it at least 16.3% easier. The larger screen is gonna assist someone in finding the cure for cancer. Bank on it.
Why is NBC Ignoring the Most Interesting Olympic Storyline?
NBC gets its multicolored peacock feathers kicked in the ratings week after week. Even its morning juggernaut ‘The Today Show’ has lost some shine off Matt Lauer’s forever-balding dome. (Seriously, the dude has been losing hair since the late 90’s. It’s time to go Kevorkian on those last few follicles.) The once mighty broadcasting bird is banking big money on the summer games.
The Careful Construction of the World’s Greatest ‘Yo Mama’ Joke
Before we begin, some rules and guidelines about the traits the mother in this joke shall not possess, only because of the overabundance of typical mom putdowns using these tired points of vilification toward the female parental unit.
10 Things You Didn’t Know About The Movie ‘Groundhog Day’
Just as watching a fat rodent sticking his head out of a hole has become tradition every February 2nd, so has watching the movie that takes it’s name — it’s Groundhog Day! The Bill Murray film is a classic and loved by millions, especially everyone watching it right this very moment on TV (it’s playing SOMEWHERE in the world) but here are ten odd facts about the movie that you probably didn’t know
Dr. Pepper TEN Is Not For Women [PICTURE]
We like a good, honest advertising campaign. Dr. Pepper is giving us just what we want in their new Dr. Pepper TEN campaign. Honesty.
Man Sues White Castle Over Booth Size
Normally a lawsuit involving a fast food chain and a patron has something to do with the food. In the case of Martin Kessman versus White Castle the main complaint by Mr. Kessman is that the restaurant’s booths aren’t big enough. Online Dish explains how his local White Castle repeatedly broke promises to make the booths at his local franchise bigger.
Man in Gumby Suit Tries to Rob 7-11 (But Doesn’t End Up in the Pokey) [VIDEO]
A man dressed as Gumby made such a horrible attempt at robbing a 7-11 store that the clerk thought it was all a joke. The assailant told the clerk he was being robbed then fumbled inside his costume as if he was going to pull out a gun. He ended up dropping 27 cents on the floor and being told by the man behind the counter “not to waste his time.”
Man Miraculously Walks Away After Horrific Motorcycle Crash [VIDEO]
Let this video of a motorcyclist crashing at top speed into a passing truck be a lesson to all drivers: Motorcycles are dangerous, riders should always wear a helmet and Ryan Gosling probably won’t be around to smooth things over when the two drivers meet. Despite the severity of the crash (which shatters the motorcycle in question), its rider miraculously gets up and walks it off.
Unemployed Man Finds $150K in Vegetable Garden
Here is how the cheesy late-90′s stand-up comic buried deep in our subconscious would report this story: “Hey folks! Did you read the story in the Northwest Herald today about a guy in Illinois that found $150K in his backyard garden? Talk about growing some cabbage! Am I right folks? Those are a different kind of greens my friends! You hear what I’m saying everyone?!?”
Cat Against Dog in a Winner-Take-All Stare-Down [VIDEO]
It’s a classic stare-down: cat stares at dog, dog stares at cat and viewer stares at screen wondering what the heck is taking them so long. Come on fellas! Out of your respective corners and let’s get this fight going. Cat versus dog. Who you got?
The Spaghetti Fork Makes Getting Fat Even Easier [VIDEO]
Inventor Bob Balow understands that common folk don’t want a man of his superior genius working on cures for cancer or a way to get ‘Dharma & Greg’ back on television. Sure, those would be nice, but what the people really demand is an easier way to shovel food into their mouth. Bob Balow is a man of the people and those people yearn for the Spaghetti-Pasta-Noodle Fork.