Hard Liquor, Soft Heart – Redneck Headlines

Two Detroit women were busted on assault charges after they got all twisted over being given the wrong dipping sauce at a mall pretzel stand.

The women, whose names were not released, attacked the server at an Auntie Anne's location after returning midway through their snack to demand different dips. The server refused, since they'd already eaten part of the first sauce. That's when the gals decided to repeat their demand - this time with their fists, jumping over the counter to deliver a honey of a beat down to the worker, who mustered no counter attack.

Charges are still pending. Source: MSN

A Rhode Island woman who drove her Jeep into a parked car was charged with driving under the influence of both alcohol and the Hallmark channel.

When deputies pulled Heather Gardner over, the 27-year-old told them she knew she shouldn't be behind the wheel, but defended her decision to hit the road by saying, "You don't understand, I just want to cuddle." Cops said Gardner's eyes were bloodshot and she reeked of alcohol when she got out. She declined a sobriety test by saying, "What's the point, I'm drunk. I don't drink and drive often - otherwise I'd be good at it."

Police said as she was released, Gardner was surprised that she'd hit another car and asked police how she got out of her vehicle. Source: Newport Patch