weapons

Robbery 101: before you try to shake down a public establishment, make sure no one there is armed.

Most city ordinances prevent liquor stores and strip joints from being too close to schools. But what about a gun range?

Well, this is humiliating. Thieves using bolt cutters were able to force their way into a supposedly secure building earlier Thursday morning and steal 21 MP-5 submachine guns and 12 large caliber handgun from the Los Angeles police department’s prestigious SWAT unit.

Picture this: You just moved to a new city, and in an effort to unclutter your life, you brought only the bare essentials to your new apartment. Maybe that includes a kitchen knife. It probably doesn’t include a knife sharpener, though. But now, through overuse and/or improper care, that one kitchen knife can barely slice through a stick of butter, and you’re too poor frugal to buy something new.

After abandoning his car in the middle of a busy interstate, Cicero, Indiana man Bryon Womack stripped down to his shorts and shoes began marching along the side of the highway while swinging a 35-inch samurai sword ”up and down in rhythm with his marching cadence.” Well, it didn’t take long for the police to get involved, and after a brief struggle in which Womack tried to jump in another vehicle