Car Hits Bigfoot In Montana – Redneck Headlines
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Here are today's Redneck Headlines:
#1 - Car Hits Bigfoot In Montana
#2 - Foot Fault
#3 - Breaking, Entering and Lecturing
A man who was trying to scare to death the locals in northwestern Montana by dressing up as Bigfoot was killed after he was hit by two vehicles.
According to Montana Highway Patrol, the man was sporting a military-style "Ghillie suit" and was standing in the right-hand lane of a highway near Kalispell, Montana when he was hit by one car on Sunday night. Then, he was hit by the second car has he lay on the highway.
The man was identified as 44-year-old Randy Lee Tenley of Kalispell. After interviewing some of his friends, Trooper Jim Schneider determined Tenley's motive. Schneider told the DailyInterLake.com, "He was trying to make people think he was Sasquatch so people would call in a Sasquatch sighting. You can't make it up. I haven't seen or heard anything like this before."
Source: The Associated Press
A Maryland man already had one foot in the jail door after being busted for a street brawl, but then he added a real kicker -- by taking off his worn out shoes in the police car and lacing up a brand-new pair of Nikes left there by his arresting officer.
Deputy Neal Robey noticed the felonious footwear flip-flop when Victor Alvarega emerged from the back of the cruiser. Alvarega was sporting kicks that looked familiar -- and his old sneakers had been left on the floor. The move led to a charge of petty larceny on top of the assault count he was already facing.
The poor sole is probably kicking himself for that dumb move right about now.
Breaking, Entering and Lecturing
A crook in Florida added insult to injury by stealing several items from a car parked in a driveway and leaving something behind -- a note telling the owner how stupid he was to leave the stuff there in the first place.
The victim, whose name hasn't been released, told police that he returned to his 2003 Toyota last Monday to find that he was missing a handgun, a hunting knife and a pile of magazines. As he turned to walk up to his house, he saw a plastic bag, on which the crook had written "loaded gun + unlocked car = stupid" and scolded him for leaving that stuff out when there were "lots of children around."
The crook actually left the gun and knife in the bag -- although he did make off with 30 rounds of ammunition and some other incidentals.
Source: Treasure Coast Palm (Florida)