The Official Rules For Sharing Chapstick
Have your lips ever been so dry and cracked you've been tempted to use someone else's Chapstick?
The thought of some other lips rubbing against that thing is gross.
But is it more or less gross if it is a stranger's lips?
How desperate are you at this point?
There is always that time when we need to moisten up and we can't find a stick.
Well, there is that other person's lip medication. They are nowhere near this room. Nor is anyone else? Do you go for it or do you SUFFER?
Since I cannot find any "OFFICIAL RUELS for winter lip balm" we have to assume that they have been unwritten all this time, So I'll just make them us and call it good.
Here are the official winter rules for Chapstick
1). You can use it any time, anywhere. You can laugh at anyone who tries to make fun of you while you apply it. Because later they will be in pain and need some but you can't loan them yours.
2). Only mom can apply the chapstick she just used on her lips to her own kids' lips. Not even dad is allowed to do that, certainly not Uncle Charlie. Aunt Ruth is allowed to apply hers to her sister's kids but they are allowed to complain while she does it.
3). Siblings are only allowed to share chapstick if they have just been in a horrible plane crash and it's a matter of survival.
4). Married couples and lovers are allowed to share all they want. Let's face it, those mouths have been all over each other, so what's the harm at this point?
5). If the seal is torn off a tube you must assume it has been used by someone else. You might be desperate but - just don't go there.
6). Giving a fresh, unopened tube of chapstick to someone else is like giving them a sip of water from your canteen while lost in a desert. It might be confused as a sign of affection, so be careful with your generosity.
7). Using someone else's chapstick when no one is looking is like trying on their used underwear. It actually is that gross. I know you're desperate but - just DON'T!
8). Kissing your lover to steal chapstick from their lips is grounds for a breakup.
"OBVIOUSLY that wasn't a KISS. You were rubbing your lips against MINE to STEAL chapstick!"
"WHAT NEXT? You going to rub your body against mine just to STEAL LOTION?"
Chapstick is not considered a liquid under TSA rules as it is a solid lip balm. This means that there is no restriction on the size or quantity that you take and you don't have to place the chapstick in a quart-sized liquids bag when you pass through security.