Dem Bums! – Redneck Headlines

Dem Bums!

A Florida woman who was ticked off about having her pro-Obama yard signs stolen got an explanation from the thief, who sent a postcard saying he took the signs down for her own good.

Jill Green says she replaced the placards, promoting the candidacy of several Democrats, at least twice, but each time, watched as they disappeared in the middle of the night. Finally, one day last week, she opened her mailbox to find a card apologizing for the thefts and saying, "I live around the corner from you and when I see signs that support Democrats I fear for the safety of our neighborhood. When thieves see pro-Democrat yard signs they automatically assume that the subdivision is filled with retards and half-wits."

The note was signed "Bat Masterson," the name of a character on a TV western more than five decades ago. (SunCoast Online)

An Iowa woman who opted not to give a tip to her pizza delivery guy was rewarded with an extra topping – when he urinated on her door after she went back inside with her order.

Chloe Teply said she phoned in her order knowing that she wasn't going to offer the driver a gratuity, admitting, "It's just one of those things where, unfortunately, I just don't have the money [for a tip]." The delivery man didn't seem p.o.'d at first, but a surveillance camera captured him in the act moments later. Teply defended stiffing him, saying, "If you're going to get upset by things like that, maybe you shouldn't be a pizza delivery driver at all."

The driver returned to the scene to clean up his act, but lost his job anyway. (KCCI)

A Sign of the Times

In what's sure to be seen as a good sign for traffic safety, a Cleveland woman was forced to wear a bad sign – to atone for driving on the sidewalk to avoid stopping behind a school bus.

Shena Hardin was busted after the bus driver, who'd seen her pull the dangerous, illegal move in the past, videotaped her driving up onto a sidewalk in front of a day care center in order to shave a few seconds off her commute.

A judge temporarily suspended her license and issuedd a $250 fine – and ordered Hardin to spend an hour a day standing at a nearby intersection holding a sign reading: "Only an idiot drives on the sidewalk to avoid a school bus." (WJKW)