The Naked and the Dead – Redneck Headlines

In what's sure to be seen as a good sign for traffic safety, a Cleveland woman was forced to wear a bad sign – to atone for driving on the sidewalk to avoid stopping behind a school bus.

Shena Hardin was busted after the bus driver, who'd seen her pull the dangerous, illegal move in the past, videotaped her driving up onto a sidewalk in front of a day care center in order to shave a few seconds off her commute.

A judge temporarily suspended her license and issuedd a $250 fine – and ordered Hardin to spend an hour a day standing at a nearby intersection holding a sign reading: "Only an idiot drives on the sidewalk to avoid a school bus." (WJKW)

Stealing a Few Winks

A Florida man ended up channeling both Dopey and Sleepy after breaking into a house and swiping a few small items – before deciding to take a cat nap on the couch of the burglary victim.

Joseph Sherman LaCross jimmied his way into the residence through a locked garage door and scooped up a handful of things, including a bottle of nail polish and a Gatorade, which he guzzled before taking his siesta. He apparently had a bigger target in mind, since he'd disconnected the flat screen television and moved it, but didn't remove it from the residence.

LaCross was charged with burglary and larceny and transported to prison. (NWF Daily News)

The Naked and the Dead

A coffin maker in Poland is getting a cold reception from church officials for its decision to promote its new line of caskets with scantily clad models.

The sexy snapshots are part of a promotional calendar created for the firm. In one, a gal is shown wearing only a skimpy thong and with a snake draped around her neck, reclining on a coffin. In another, a woman wearing a crimson corset is depicted pulling out the heart of a man lying on a casket.

A spokesman for the Catholic church slammed the photos, saying death should be treated with dignity, but the coffin maker shrugged off the criticism, saying, "A coffin isn't a religious symbol; it's a product." (Huffington Post)