Hystericaly Accurate Ways To Prepare For Winter In Wyoming

Are the artic cold blow vents up in Canada working okay? How are those snow machines doing? Let's crank them up and see if they need tweaking.

Are we ready for road closures?

Then what about those of us who need a moment or so to remember how to walk and even drive in snow? Can we have a couple of days to get used to that again?

THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION! - Do we have the house stashed with munchies, and is our Netflix paid up in case we get stuck at home for a while? That's all we really need to do to survive a snow event these days. For our grandparents, it was a matter of survival. Today, it's a few days off from work.

Can we handle our kids not going to school? We might be stuck at home with them, along with other - (gasp) - relatives that we just can't stand.

Did we work out enough this summer to shovel snow this winter? Probably not.

These are important questions. Why do Wyomingites feel as if they are ready for the next big snow event, which will come -- oh yes, it will.

The experts have tallied the results. The people are feeling pretty confident about taking on this winter when it finally gets here.

"We can take anything Canada throws at us," grumbled Dirk Blachart of Orin Junction. "They've been jamming our vending machines with their fancy schmancy Canadian coins and throwing winter at us for generations. I'm surprised we haven't invaded them yet."

Wyoming scored very low on being stuck at home with relatives, and the kids—other than that, we are good.

Yes, it looks like Wyoming is ready for whatever is about to slap us this winter.
Winter test over. Until we have to start driving. Then we are screwed.